How to Build Strong Relationships with Online Instructors

4 April 2025

Online learning is like ordering takeout—you get what you need from the comfort of home, but sometimes, it's missing that personal touch. One of the biggest challenges of online education is forming relationships with instructors. Let's be real; it’s easy to feel like just another name on the class roster when you're staring at a screen instead of sitting in a classroom.

But guess what? Your instructors are real people (shocking, I know), and building a solid relationship with them can make your online learning experience way better. Whether you need guidance, networking opportunities, or just someone to answer your late-night questions after you’ve procrastinated (again), a strong rapport with your instructor is a game-changer. So, let’s dive into how you can make that happen!

1. Be More Than Just a Username

Let’s start with the basics. If your instructor only knows you as "Student_14567," you're going to have a hard time building any kind of connection. Introduce yourself early on in the course—send a quick email or post in the class discussion introducing yourself, your goals, and maybe a fun fact (like how you can eat an entire pizza in one sitting).

When participating in discussions, use your real name or a preferred screen name that makes you recognizable. That way, when you email your professor with questions, they don't have to play detective to figure out who you are.

2. Show Up and Engage (Even When It’s Tempting to Ghost)

Online classes don’t have a seating chart, but that doesn’t mean you should disappear. Show up consistently, participate in discussions, and contribute meaningfully.

If you’re in a live session, ask questions, respond to prompts, and don’t be afraid to unmute yourself (even if your dog barks in the background). If your class is asynchronous, engage in discussion boards and respond to your classmates’ posts. Even just a simple “Wow, that’s an interesting point!” goes a long way in making yourself known.

3. Communication is Key – Don’t Be Afraid to Reach Out

Your instructor isn’t a mind reader (though that would make grading exams way easier). If you have questions or concerns, reach out! Email is usually the best way, but check your syllabus—some instructors prefer office hours, messaging systems, or even good old-fashioned carrier pigeons (okay, probably not that last one).

When emailing, be polite but casual. Professors are people too, and they’re not expecting Shakespearean-level formalities. A simple, “Hey Professor [Last Name], I’m struggling a bit with [topic]. Could we chat about it?” is way better than a robotic, “Dear Esteemed Instructor, I am writing to inquire about the complexities of….” You get the idea.

4. Keep It Professional (But Not Stiff)

While it’s great to be friendly, keep in mind that your instructor isn’t your texting buddy. Avoid slang, emojis (unless they use them first), and overly casual language. Think of it like talking to a cool boss—you want to be approachable, but also respectful.

Also, if you’re reaching out for help, don’t wait until 11:59 PM the night before an assignment is due. That’s like asking your friend for a ride five minutes before you have to be at the airport—it’s just not a good look.

5. Participate in Virtual Office Hours

If your professor offers virtual office hours, take advantage! Even if you don’t have pressing questions, dropping in just to say hi and discuss the course can help you stand out. Plus, it's a chance to get advice, clarification, and maybe even a little career guidance.

Think of it as a teacher’s version of "happy hour"—except instead of cocktails, you're getting knowledge (which is almost as good). Professors appreciate students who take the initiative, and showing up for office hours proves you're serious about the course.

6. Submit Quality Work (It’s the Best Way to Impress)

Look, no one is asking you to be Einstein, but putting effort into your work speaks volumes. Professors notice students who put thought into their assignments. Even if you're struggling with a topic, showing that you're genuinely trying makes a great impression.

And here’s a bonus tip: if you need an extension, ask before the deadline, not after. Instructors are much more likely to be flexible if you communicate your situation ahead of time instead of scrambling with excuses after the fact.

7. Show Appreciation (A Little "Thank You" Goes a Long Way)

Professors deal with a lot—grading, answering emails, and trying not to lose their minds over technical issues. A simple, “Thanks for the feedback!” or “I really appreciate your help” can make their day.

At the end of the course, consider sending a short thank-you email. If they really made an impact on you, you could even leave a great review or recommend them to future students. Being remembered as “that polite, hardworking student” is never a bad thing.

8. Stay in Touch After the Course Ends

Your relationship with an instructor doesn’t have to end just because the semester does. If you genuinely enjoyed their course, consider keeping in touch. LinkedIn is great for this—connect with them and occasionally engage with their posts. If you ever need a recommendation or advice in the future, having that established connection will make it much easier to reach out.

Just don’t be the person who vanishes for two years and then randomly reappears asking for a letter of recommendation with zero context. That’s like not talking to a friend for ages and suddenly asking them to help you move a couch—awkward.

9. Be Patient and Understanding

Professors juggle dozens (sometimes hundreds) of students, so if they don’t reply to your email within five minutes, don’t panic. Give them a reasonable amount of time—24 to 48 hours during the workweek is usually fair.

Also, if there’s a technical glitch or grading delay, don’t immediately assume they’re out to ruin your life. Instead of sending an angry email, try, “Hey, I noticed [issue]. Just wanted to check if there's an update. Thanks!” It’s way more effective than an all-caps rant demanding answers.

Conclusion

Building a strong relationship with your online instructor isn’t rocket science—it’s just about being present, professional, and proactive. Treat them like a real person (because, spoiler alert, they are), and you’ll find that they’re more willing to support and guide you through your academic journey.

At the end of the day, your instructors can be valuable mentors, professional contacts, and even friends in the field. So don’t be a faceless name in the system—engage, communicate, and make the most out of your online learning experience!